Gators Attempt to Redefine ANZAC Spirit

Reports are trickling in that the Gator’s head coach has begun a petition to redefine the meaning of ANZAC day.

The petition, posted on /https://www.change.org/p/australia-lest-we-forget-1904, simply reads "Lest we Forget 1904". Readers might be initially fooled into thinking this is to raise awareness about the oft overlooked Russo-Japanese war between 1904-1905, which historians agree was one of the main preludes to WW1, but upon closer inspection it appears the Gators have tactlessly piggybacked on this tragic event in a shameless signature grab. The petition description reveals that the "1904" in the title actually refers to score the Gators achieved this week in UKL. The Gators have certainly been chirpy recently but this is a case of their arrogance crossing the line.

When the Integrity Officer of the UKL, Nicholas Oakley, was contacted in regards to the allegatortions he refused to provide comment because "it wasn’t Marty or Paul so he didn’t give a f**k".

Pictured below: Aaron’s big head asking tourists whether they’re aware that "1904 is a UKL league record"

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Good call/bad call – Rd2

Hutchy Gazza
The Barbs have the 3 best players in the league Don’t get ahead of yourself call. Treloar aka ‘the butcher’ cant hit a target on his opposite foot. Grundy is the sole ruckman in a team with a rolls Royce midfield yet the Pies sit 0-2 and equal 10th for centre clearances.

And Merret has the haircut of an awkward pubescent teen. What’s with that?

Great call!

Trio of Treloar, Merrett and Grundy score better and are younger than their contemporaries

It’s finally happened, the Rines are finished Let’s celebrate call! Team doesn’t know whether it’s coming or going. A mini-rebuild on the cards Early call.

If they don’t recover to at least 4-4 by the first mid-season break, it’ll be time to hit reset

Titans have been ultra-unlucky since winning the flag in 2015 No such thing as luck call. You make your own luck in this game. Good call, too players have lost too many things call!

Swan (lost in the Jungle)

Boomer (lost to the ammos)

Ablett (lost interest)

Ceglar (lost ACL)

The UKL coaching fraternity has lost their bants Harsh call. This isn’t a rock up with a hangover half an hour before & smoke a dart at 3qtr time bullshit amateur league. If you’re here primarily for the banter, smell you later. Fantastic call! Where are the wagers and belittling comments call!  Lack of bants is home

Round 3

Vipers should get the win this weekend which will take them to 2 and 1. It is hard to make a case for Niall’s Badgers in this matchup. Playing the reigning premiers with 2 players down and averaging a poultry 1130.5 ppg, this would be the BIGGEST upset in our UKLs short history if the Badgers recorded a win.

The Ducks just win as Aaron pointed out in a previous post. This week should be no exception. The Barbarians have played 1-2 players down each round so far and that just makes it harder for the Barbarians to get the W.

The Wolverines will play 1 player down this week. Rhys Stanley is the man who is dropped from the Cats line up this weekend. As Barrett said in Sliding Doors, signs are not looking good for him if he’s getting dropped this early in the season. Rhys Stanley will be the sole reason why the Wolverines will go 0 wins and 3 losses and put an end to any attempt of making the top 4. Rebuild will begin in the 1st trade period this year.

Dan Hannebery has given up the drink but the Scorpions have found a way to win in both rounds with the captain scoring nowhere near where he should. The Outlaws coach rates his team too highly and there isn’t enough depth to beat the Pions’. Scorpions 3-0 Outlaws 0-3.

Match of the round between the Pual’s Titans and Aaron’s Gators. Both have a full team and Jared Tallent all over the field. I couldn’t choose a winner so I have flipped a coin. Gators win, Titans lose. Finals over for Titans